WEBVTT 00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:00.300 Unknown: Paisley. 00:00:05.640 --> 00:00:07.680 Paisley: Hey, welcome back, everybody. Paisley. I Perfect 00:00:07.680 --> 00:00:10.260 here again today, and today we're going to talk about 00:00:10.260 --> 00:00:13.860 something that can get a little heated. My goal is to approach 00:00:13.860 --> 00:00:17.220 it with logic and understanding. But if you feel that I 00:00:17.220 --> 00:00:20.120 misrepresent something, please let me know it is never my 00:00:20.120 --> 00:00:26.000 intention to make anyone feel excluded or unwanted, and I'm 00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:29.360 going to introduce it with a quote from elder D Todd 00:00:29.360 --> 00:00:33.200 Christofferson. He said, an area of concern comes from those who, 00:00:33.200 --> 00:00:37.040 in the name of equality, want to erase all differences between 00:00:37.040 --> 00:00:40.600 the masculine and the feminine. Often this takes the form of 00:00:40.600 --> 00:00:43.480 pushing women to adopt more masculine traits, be more 00:00:43.480 --> 00:00:46.540 aggressive, tough and confrontational. It is now 00:00:46.540 --> 00:00:50.680 common in movies and video games to see women in terribly violent 00:00:50.680 --> 00:00:55.360 roles, leaving dead bodies and mayhem in their wake. It is soul 00:00:55.360 --> 00:00:59.140 numbing to see men in such roles, and certainly no less so 00:00:59.140 --> 00:01:01.800 when women are the ones perpetrating and suffering the 00:01:01.800 --> 00:01:08.580 violence as women, I fear that we have done ourselves a bit of 00:01:08.580 --> 00:01:14.340 a disservice. We are equal to men. We always have been but 00:01:14.400 --> 00:01:20.360 equal does not mean the same. Before you freak out, please 00:01:20.360 --> 00:01:23.480 understand we have not always been equal in the eyes of the 00:01:23.480 --> 00:01:28.400 law. We have not always been equal in the eyes of men, and we 00:01:28.400 --> 00:01:34.220 have not always been equal in our own eyes. I need to be very 00:01:34.220 --> 00:01:39.380 clear in stating that that is not what I mean. What I do mean 00:01:40.100 --> 00:01:45.460 is that as women, our roles are different and distinct from the 00:01:45.460 --> 00:01:50.140 roles of men. They are not less, they are not more, they are 00:01:50.140 --> 00:01:55.900 equal and different. Both sets of roles are needed and 00:01:55.900 --> 00:02:00.840 necessary for our society to properly function, and because 00:02:00.840 --> 00:02:05.880 of that need for both of those roles to be to exist and to be 00:02:05.880 --> 00:02:09.960 working together, because of that need, that need is what 00:02:09.960 --> 00:02:15.360 makes those roles equal. Still does not make them the same. It 00:02:15.360 --> 00:02:19.500 just makes them equal. And before somebody decides to tell 00:02:19.500 --> 00:02:23.900 me that this is a purely Mormon view. Here are a few more quotes 00:02:23.900 --> 00:02:26.420 from people who are not members of the Church of Jesus Christ, 00:02:26.420 --> 00:02:28.760 of Latter Day, saints that support what Christopherson is 00:02:28.760 --> 00:02:33.440 saying. Don't worry, I'll link. I'll link out to him in the in 00:02:33.440 --> 00:02:37.340 the show description too, so you'll be able to learn more if 00:02:37.340 --> 00:02:42.220 you want to. The first one comes from Pope John Paul the second 00:02:42.460 --> 00:02:48.040 in 1988 he said, the personal resources of femininity are 00:02:48.040 --> 00:02:51.700 certainly no less than the resources of masculinity. They 00:02:51.700 --> 00:02:56.140 are merely different. Hence, a woman as well as a man, must 00:02:56.140 --> 00:03:01.200 understand her fulfillment as a person, her dignity and vocation 00:03:01.440 --> 00:03:05.760 on the basis of this principle. He also said women's 00:03:05.760 --> 00:03:09.480 contribution is uniquely valuable, and the equal dignity 00:03:09.480 --> 00:03:15.300 of men and women is realized in their unique roles. I think that 00:03:15.300 --> 00:03:19.140 supports what I said before, that our society needs both of 00:03:19.140 --> 00:03:25.160 those roles as distinct and different, and that need is what 00:03:25.160 --> 00:03:29.240 makes them equal. The second quote comes from, and I'm 00:03:29.240 --> 00:03:33.140 probably going to butcher this name, I apologize someone named 00:03:33.320 --> 00:03:38.660 chim Amanda Ngozi Adichie in a TED talk titled We Should All Be 00:03:38.660 --> 00:03:43.840 Feminists, she said, I think the most honest answer is that women 00:03:43.840 --> 00:03:46.180 and men are different, and we should embrace those 00:03:46.180 --> 00:03:50.620 differences, instead of trying to erase them. Embrace versus 00:03:50.620 --> 00:03:54.940 erase and one more. This one comes from a guy named Jordan 00:03:54.940 --> 00:03:58.240 Peterson. He's a clinical psychologist and professor, and 00:03:58.240 --> 00:04:01.500 he said men and women are more alike than they are different, 00:04:01.500 --> 00:04:05.100 but the differences are significant. They're 00:04:05.100 --> 00:04:10.560 complementary, not competitive. So we have been given these 00:04:10.560 --> 00:04:13.800 roles and responsibilities and the capabilities to fulfill 00:04:13.800 --> 00:04:16.860 them, and we were given the roles, responsibilities and 00:04:16.860 --> 00:04:20.660 capabilities before we came to this planet. It's part of the 00:04:20.660 --> 00:04:25.460 plan. It's part of our Heavenly Father's plan. For us, we don't 00:04:25.460 --> 00:04:30.260 have to be the same to be equal. So the quote that I shared at 00:04:30.260 --> 00:04:33.020 the beginning from Elder Christofferson came from a talk 00:04:33.080 --> 00:04:38.540 that he gave back in 2013 titled The moral force of women. And 00:04:38.540 --> 00:04:41.560 while I know that we already have a huge list of things that 00:04:41.560 --> 00:04:44.620 we're trying to work on, from presidents Kimball and Nelson 00:04:46.540 --> 00:04:50.800 elder. Christofferson shares a quote from a former general, 00:04:50.800 --> 00:04:55.360 young women's President Margaret, Dean adald, and she 00:04:55.360 --> 00:04:59.020 adds a few more that I'm going to put on our list. She said the 00:04:59.020 --> 00:05:02.400 world has enough. Enough women who are tough, we need women who 00:05:02.400 --> 00:05:07.620 are tender. Notice. She didn't say strong, she said tough. The 00:05:07.620 --> 00:05:10.140 world has enough women who are tough. We need women who are 00:05:10.140 --> 00:05:14.160 tender. The world has enough women who are coarse. We need 00:05:14.160 --> 00:05:19.020 women who are kind. There are enough women who are rude. We 00:05:19.020 --> 00:05:22.580 need women who are refined. We have enough women of fame and 00:05:22.580 --> 00:05:27.080 fortune. We need more women of faith. We have enough greed, we 00:05:27.080 --> 00:05:31.040 need more goodness. We have enough vanity, we need more 00:05:31.040 --> 00:05:35.300 virtue. We have enough popularity, we need more purity. 00:05:35.900 --> 00:05:39.560 And then Elder Christofferson adds to the end of that quote, 00:05:39.560 --> 00:05:43.900 he says, In blurring feminine and masculine differences, we 00:05:43.900 --> 00:05:47.560 lose the distinct, complementary gifts of women and men that 00:05:47.560 --> 00:05:52.900 together produce a greater whole. I've been told that I 00:05:52.900 --> 00:05:57.100 tend to oversimplify my i My analogies, but I'm going to 00:05:57.160 --> 00:06:03.120 share one anyway. I love food. I love lots of different kinds of 00:06:03.120 --> 00:06:07.140 food. I love Mexican food, Chinese food, Italian food. I 00:06:07.140 --> 00:06:13.320 love Filipino food, Southern barbecue, fish and chips. I'm 00:06:13.320 --> 00:06:15.540 not really a fan of Mediterranean. It doesn't really 00:06:15.540 --> 00:06:19.440 like me either. But other than that, I generally just love 00:06:19.440 --> 00:06:25.040 food. What would happen if we took all of those different and 00:06:25.040 --> 00:06:31.040 distinct kinds of food and tried to make them all equal in the 00:06:31.040 --> 00:06:35.300 world's definition of equal meaning the same? What would 00:06:35.300 --> 00:06:39.320 happen if we told the Mexicans that they couldn't use cumin or 00:06:39.320 --> 00:06:42.820 cilantro in their cooking anymore. What if we told the 00:06:42.820 --> 00:06:48.640 Italians no more basil, no more thyme, no more oregano. What if 00:06:48.640 --> 00:06:53.980 we said everybody can only have white rice, no butter, no soy 00:06:53.980 --> 00:07:01.200 sauce, no salt, just plain old white rice, no brown rice, no 00:07:01.200 --> 00:07:06.000 frying it. You have to cook it all the same way. You can only 00:07:06.000 --> 00:07:10.680 eat vegetables on the side and only the ones that are currently 00:07:10.680 --> 00:07:16.980 in season for your area. That's not even the same. We can't make 00:07:16.980 --> 00:07:19.980 bread anymore because it would be different in different 00:07:19.980 --> 00:07:24.200 regions throughout the world and different based on your economic 00:07:24.200 --> 00:07:28.700 status. So we can't have bread, we can only have rice and 00:07:28.700 --> 00:07:35.540 vegetables. That's not what equal means. That's what the 00:07:35.540 --> 00:07:40.540 same means. But we're not the same. We are not meant to be the 00:07:40.540 --> 00:07:44.500 same. We are different. We are meant to be different. But 00:07:44.500 --> 00:07:46.780 that's what we're trying to do, and getting the women and 00:07:46.780 --> 00:07:50.140 getting the roles of women and men to be exactly the same. 00:07:50.440 --> 00:07:53.200 Instead of embracing our differences and being able to go 00:07:53.200 --> 00:07:56.800 have Mexican food for lunch and Italian food for dinner, we are 00:07:56.800 --> 00:08:05.460 trying to make them all the same. I mean, as a society, I 00:08:05.460 --> 00:08:09.600 think that we are finally starting to learn, finally 00:08:09.600 --> 00:08:13.080 starting to learn how to embrace different kinds of cultures. 00:08:13.680 --> 00:08:17.100 There are traditions, there are different kinds of food, there 00:08:17.100 --> 00:08:19.800 are different ways of doing things. We are finally starting 00:08:19.800 --> 00:08:22.340 to learn how to do that. I mean, how do you think I've tasted so 00:08:22.340 --> 00:08:30.200 many different kinds of food, right? But if we can't learn to 00:08:30.200 --> 00:08:34.520 embrace them and start trying to make them all the same, we will 00:08:34.520 --> 00:08:38.600 end up with a very bland menu. And like I said, I know 00:08:38.780 --> 00:08:43.060 oversimplified. There are so many complications in that right 00:08:44.020 --> 00:08:49.360 we would have to in order for men's roles distinct and 00:08:49.360 --> 00:08:53.200 different from women's roles distinct and different, in order 00:08:53.200 --> 00:09:00.720 for them to be held to the same standard, to be seen as equal, 00:09:01.080 --> 00:09:05.100 we would have to erase things like selfishness, pride, 00:09:05.520 --> 00:09:09.720 arrogance, dishonesty, laziness, intolerance, unreliability, 00:09:10.020 --> 00:09:13.740 rudeness, vanity, popularity, some of those things are 00:09:13.740 --> 00:09:20.040 starting to sound a little familiar, but as A closing 00:09:20.040 --> 00:09:24.080 reminder, here's how we can do it, going back to that quote 00:09:24.080 --> 00:09:30.320 from nadald, be women who are tender, kind, refined and good, 00:09:30.800 --> 00:09:36.080 have faith virtue and purity, while strongly defending and 00:09:36.080 --> 00:09:40.420 protecting children and families. We can do that. And if 00:09:40.420 --> 00:09:44.920 you ask me, that is the true definite definition of 00:09:44.920 --> 00:09:49.000 femininity. Thank you for being here with me again today. Keep 00:09:49.000 --> 00:09:53.320 learning, keep growing, and be strong and of good cheer until 00:09:53.320 --> 00:09:53.860 next time you.